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I am seeking You, Lord. I need to take off all the impurities of my flesh. Although I want to live according to Your Word, the handicap of my flesh is always tugging on me. As I draw closer to You, I realize that I have perfect peace and contentment in You. I don’t have the flare ups of my flesh to try to distract me. I am putting my flesh into subjection.
It’s too bad that I have to have this elevated closeness to You because of fasting and not that it is just there. I am trying to understand myself. I figure that I must fast routinely. If I fail to fast, my flesh begins to flare up. I feel a closeness to You through my fasting. This means that if this is what it takes to be close to You, then this is what I must do. I must never leave Your presence. If it means that I must fast weekly in order to get the outcome, then this is what I’ll do. I must determine what to do before my flesh is flaring up, wanting to do unholy things, or when my mind wanders away from focusing on You. I must be in complete control of my flesh. Give me strength and wisdom to walk the way of Your Word without the encumbrances of the flesh. I desire to be in Your Will.
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Let me, O Lord, crave to eat Your flesh. Your coming to give life everlasting is the will of God. My believing in You is the will of God. I eat your flesh by believing. I drink your blood by believing in your resurrection. I want to continue to get closer to You. Help me, Lord, to not seek temporal things, but rather, spiritual things: the things that lead to and are of everlasting life.
I realize that the ultimate in life for me is to share the knowledge of Jesus Christ with others so that they can have abundant life. All the worldly and unholy conditioning that has shaped me into seeking to become someone that is reverence by men I must put away. Your Word says that those things that are esteemed by men, you hold in abomination.
Let me seek and do things that You esteem. I realize that I have sought the things that men hold in high regard. I must put those asunder, focusing only on the things that are pleasing to You. Help me to recognize what they are. Let my heart be filled with the desire to be pleasing to You. O Lord, You have manifested to me the profoundness of You when I trust in and commit my ways to You. I realize that Your Word is true and I have faith in it. But, what has happened to me in terms of giving me something that I deeply is very supernatural.
Although it may not be possible for others to understand the profoundness of this, I completely understand. This speaks to the deepest and most inner part of me. This shows your realness in my life. I understand that You are there to give such good things to those who trust in You. I realize that I once did not have the trust in You that I now have. O Lord, let me not ever lose the closeness I have to You, but let me get closer. You are a great God. I must do everything to keep my focus on You. I must not let anything of the flesh and world come in between my desire to be a devout Christian. Thank You Lord. You have shown a miracle in my life. Dear Lord, I ask that I can draw nearer to You. I need Your comfort and presence to continue. It appears that I am constantly bombarded with so many things that pertain to the daily upkeep for living. I would like, Lord, that You give me the strength and insight to deal with every situation I have. Sometimes I feel like I would like to just give up on all the details that go into living. I feel that I must give so much of myself to keep things going in a functional manner for my family and me.
Sometimes I feel that I am overwhelmed with it and would like to chill out. I know, Lord, that Your will is for me to care for my family and provide sustenance for them. I am actually not looking for strength to do this task; I know that You have properly equipped me with the tools to do this. But, please give me the mind to perform the tasks in a joyful and pleasing manner to You. I am Your child, so please take care of me. Let me not be put to the test of choosing a fleshly desire over Your will. I will keep my mind on You. Let my wisdom increase so that others can see it and glorify You. |